I CAN MOONWALK!
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
