Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
they need to just BURY HIM!
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
you made out with another girl for some wings
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
