her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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