We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
