Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
