How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
