Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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