Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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