Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
