yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize