My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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