Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
