Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
