he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
