I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
MIDGETS
????
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
