Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
