I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
