:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
