I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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