That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
