yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
