and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
