I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Girls should come with a carfax report
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
