I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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