We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
