So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Randomize
