They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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