Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
