you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
