Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
do herpes really smell.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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