If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I am midnight drunk by noon
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
