They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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