that's an acceptable place to lick
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
