i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I smell stomach acid.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
