I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
