meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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