That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
