Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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