Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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