We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
