For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
