Have you finally orgasmed yet?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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