Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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