grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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