Ketchup is God's man juice
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
