I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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