O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
