MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
