Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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