you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
